Bayonetta…

Is this porn? I thought I rented a video game.

So the premise is, you are Bayonetta, the supposed last surviving Umbra Witch who was outcast and has lost her memory. She’s taken up lot with the Hellspawn over the last 20 years, as she fights (and kicks some serious ass) the minions of heaven all the while popping in and out of Pergatory (everyday Earth) to harass some schmuck who’s chasing after her to get revenge for the death of his father.

The Applegeeks guys hit the hammer on the nail with their Lite strip:

Button punching. There are so many different combinations of buttons to push in this thing… My thumbs are sore. To be honest, I expected a whole lot more from this game based on marketing. Once I got into it, I wanted a whole lot less. Once again, this is one of those titles from Japan that leave me wondering, “what the hell is wrong with you people?” Anyone who watches anime is familiar with “fan service”. Well, this game is loaded with it, and I’ve never really cared for it. To give you a good example, think Najica Blitz Tactics.

Outside of the annoying ecchi (who in the hell would think up using your hair as a “uniform”?), the gameplay elements are pretty fun. You go around beating the snot of stuff and laying some serious smackdown. Graphics are awesome, and the sound effects are really cool assuming you have a DTS audio setup. If you can get past the retarded fan service, the story has some hilarity to its entertainment value and it’s worth the play. Give it a rent, at least.

 

l8rz.

Evolution of the RPG on 360.

The Role-Playing Game (RPG) genre on the Xbox 360 has been weak since the release of the console. Over the last year or so, however, there have been some releases to help out this genre and, hopefully, give it new life.

One I just recently finished is Magna Carta 2. Now this is not the most advanced of RPGs, but it can have it’s place. It’s developed around the Unreal engine, but you can definitely tell this is a translation of a Japanese game. The thing that bothered me most is the dialog screens. The characters appear on each side of the screen (depending on who is talking), move their arm up and down or bow their head and the mouth moves. Not much for a cut scene. The game did have a few full-motion video (FMV) sequences, however; and the story eventually progresses enough to keep you entertained. Overall, I wasn’t disappointed. I just realized I can’t put that much time into RPGs any more.

One major disappointment has been Final Fantasy XIII. I never got very far with XII on the PS2, but I loved the game. It was leaps and bounds past its siblings. For XIII, I can understand that Square Enix was trying to put a new spin on their fortune flagship franchise, but I’m gonna have to say they “facepalmed” with this one. I’m not even sure I would classify it as an RPG as much as I would an adventure with a LOT of frikin movie sequences. You play for 15 minutes, then you have to go through a 5-10 min movie. To be honest, I felt the only things that classified it as a RPG are the character upgrade enhancements and their battle system, of which you control one of the 3 characters in your party (and you don’t get to choose who you want as your party leader until disc 3). Now Square Enix lived up to their reputation of awe-gaping graphics and sensually melodious soundtrack. I’ll give them that part. No one else has ever managed to rival them in those departments, so far. I still haven’t finished the game (I am on disc 3), and probably won’t for a while. I’ll get back to it eventually.

There are some other decent titles out there for the 360 in this arena if you’ve got the time for them: Mass Effect, Dragon Age: Origins, Infinite Undiscovery. You just have to be careful when picking from this genre these days. You don’t get the development put into these like before. Players scream for online multiplayer venues like Halo and Gears. Most of the time, these RPGs just end up with as a translate from the East. And nothing personal against the Japanese, but there are some weirdasses over there producing games. There are just certain things about that culture I will never understand.

 

I’m sticking to shooters for a while. l8rz.

Google random funniness (via The Chive)

Being a computer geek, I felt this was worth a repost:

 

l8rz.